Happy Father's Day! So many families, will be offering up celebrations for Dads and all they do for their wives and children: barbeques, ties, cakes, homemade cards created by tiny hands with lots of glue and glitter, soap on a rope ?!, maybe a beer on the patio or a walk in the park...grateful wives expressing appreciation with a special meal, for all their husbands do to support them and care for their kids. How will you celebrate?
Or perhaps it is a really hard holiday to celebrate...one that you don't celebrate at all.
Maybe you didn't have a father who was engaged with his family. Maybe he was a workaholic, maybe he never showed up at your concerts or school plays. Or perhaps he was an alcoholic, preferring to spend his time down at the corner bar with his buddies. In all likelihood, he might have done the best job he could do, but as you grew up you felt his absence more often than his presence. Maybe his presents didn't make up for those days that he called to say he was tied up, his business trip was lasting longer than expected and he wouldn't be home again tonight for dinner. Maybe you got yourself to bed more often than not without a bedtime story or a kiss goodnight.
Did you play a sport and search the bleachers for his face, only to be disappointed time and time again when he broke his promise to be there to cheer you on? Did you struggle through your math homework knowing that his job as an engineer meant he could help you over all those hurdles in the blink of an eye but wouldn't take the time to support your monumental efforts to get passing grades? Did you practice religiously on that saxophone solo, hoping that your busy dad, would miss his weekly rehearsal to come hear you play, only to have your hopes dashed with a phone call as you were dashing out the door for your concert? Did your father say things "jokingly" that gave you the hurtful message that you just never measured up?
How do you cope? How will you break those chains and be a better father to your own children than the one you had? It's possible you know. Though there wasn't role modeling for you, you can learn how to be a great dad! It takes trials and failures and more trying. It takes courage to walk through a new door. It takes resolve and commitment. You can whisper a vow into the tiny ears of your newborn that you will never allow your children to feel that same sense of abandonment that you suffered as a child. You can promise them in your heart as the years pass by quickly, that you will be there for them whenever possible. And you can tell them in some way, every day, that you care about them and you love them, and things will be different.
You can give them the unconditional love and support that is the wind beneath their wings!
If you can relate to this post, comment below. If you have a renewed sense of hope that fatherhood will be a different experience for you than it was for your own father, (and therefore it will be a difference experience for your children) that is a reason to celebrate! Happy Father's Day to a Dad that has decided to make a difference...
For an excellent article about turning things around, read "The Real Meaning of Fatherhood" by Clint Edwards by clicking on this link- http://huff.to/1xLfqcq. It's an article full of tenderness, new hope and a fresh perspective! Enjoy your special day, Dad!
Thanks for visiting my blog :-} And as always, would love/ appreciate your comments/ shares.
Until next time...